> Fr. Daniel, please forgive me, but I spent (I won't say "wasted" but I
> want to) almost 10 years of my life playing "dress up" Orthodoxy in a
> group that desired the ancient faith without all that messy hard work
> of actually being in organic communion within the Orthodox Church.
>
> I don't say that is what's happening here. How could I know? But I do
> know that any real and lasting work any of us do will have to be
> eventually brought to the Church in communion if it is ever going to
> be "fruit that remains." This "we are going to do Orthodoxy right"
> mentality is absolutely a dead end. If you and your Old Catholic group
> have charisms and talents, bring them to the Church. Perhaps the
> Church can put them to use, but more than likely it will be as it has
> been for me, a time when my own foolish notions of my gifts and
> abilities will be put to the test in the fire of the hard work of
> communion within the Church.
>
> I also don't mean to engage in any lenghty discussion of the merits of
> this or that vision of communion and bringing America to Orthodoxy. I
> simply wish to share my own regrets for waiting so long to enter into
> the hard work of communion within the Orthodox Church. The fruit that
> this work has produced in my own life is worth much more than any of
> the perceived "gains" I thought I had outside of the organic and
> canonical communion within the Church. Please know that ever fear I
> had about the Orthodox Church was well founded.
>
> There are many within the Church who see it as nothing more than a
> place to preserve yia yia's recipies and a few colorful costumes and
> dance steps, or some ultimately futile attempt to pretend they don't
> live where they live now. There are many within the Church, especially
> here in America, who are so narrow minded that you could put out both
> eyes with one bb! There are far too many who know so little about
> their faith that they resort to silly nationalistic (and sometimes
> racist) motivations for preserving the ancient traditions of the
> faith. The sad and overwhelmingly obvious results of these weaknesses
> is that these motivations will not preserve anything these folks want
> to preserve. These weak motivations are, after all, too small to
> preserve the timeless beauty of the Faith, and too irrelevant to keep
> any of the "old world" alive. All of these fears are well founded and
> certainly insist on an "eyes wide open" approach to entering the
> Church.
>
> But in spite of these very real weaknesses, there is simply no
> substitute for the hard work of dealing with these shortcomings,
> especially with all the benefits that come.
>
> Because, for every narrow-minded person I have encountered in the
> Orthodox Church, I have encountered a hundred sincere, faithful, and
> loving believers who, through patience, compassion, and love have
> guided me to a fuller understanding of the Faith. I have seen my
> initial impressions of some of the ethno-centric baggage of the Church
> as being too short sighted myself. I have found some of these cultural
> expressions (certainly not all) to be worthy bearers of deeper truths
> that have been helpful to me in deepening my own piety and faith. I
> have watched as so-called "cradle" Orthodox grasp the deep healing
> given to them by the Faith raise their children as committed believers
> and I've watched as so-called "converts" finally see the power of
> humility in living out a sense of gratitude for those who preserved
> the faith so they could receive it. I have watched as young men and
> women come to understand that if they first dwell deeply on the
> "sublime theology" of Orthodoxy, their children will want to keep
> alive those special cultural markers that allow them to display their
> Orthodox faith in a healthy and welcoming way. Their children want to
> learn the "language" not because of some foolish and shallow
> nationalism, but because that "language" best captures the precious
> nuances of the Faith they have come to love and has so transformed
> their lives. It has been worth the work.
>
> My journey isn't over, anymore than I'm sure your's is as well. Here
> at seminary I am learning more than I ever dreamed, and much of that
> education is occuring not in a classroom but in the daily living with
> so many different people from so many different places. I have found
> my worst fears and my greatest hopes both confirmed in my canonical
> communion within the Church, and I wouldn't go back to my "dress up"
> days for anything!