5-11 Punch Lines

First airing was Jan 24, 2000.

The episode starts out with Gabrielle trying to write, but has writer's block. They are
in one of Aphrodite's temples and Xena is sleeping. Aphrodite appears and wants to know what the
problem is. Gabrielle doesn't want to bother her but Aphrodite says she's immortal and has nothing
but time.

Next Gabrielle is on a couch and Aphrodite is in a chair being a therapist. Gabrielle says she
doesn't feel complete if she can't write and doesn't know why she stopped. Aphrodite asks her what
she would write about this day.

Flashback to Gabrielle, Xena and Joxer walking and trying to think of names for Xena's
baby. Gabrielle mentions how cranky Xena is getting. Xena asks Joxer and he has flashbacks of the
times she was mean to him. But he says she was never cranky. Xena and Gabrielle make a bet that if
Xena can go one day without being cranky, Gabrielle will do all the cleaning and cooking for a
month. Xena adds in back rubs .

Gabrielle says she will take the horses to the river to wash them while Xena and Joxer go
into town for lunch. Gabrielle pours a pan of water on Argo and she shrinks down to pony size.

Back to Gabrielle and Aphrodite. Aphrodite says a shrunken horse is no big deal.
Aphrodite is writing something about Gabrielle - "patient is hostile and insecure, and possible
masking latent tendencies". Gabrielle says it's stupid and want to know how Aphrodite learned such
big words. Aphrodite say not to let the blond hair fool her. Gabrielle continues her story.

Lachrymose, the God of Despair shrunk Argo because Gabrielle was using his spring to wash
her. Gabrielle she can make him laugh and if so he agrees to take the spell of Argo. Gabrielle
tells him about the killer rabbit ("In Sickness and in Hell"), but he doesn't think it's funny.

In a tavern. Joxer and Xena are next to a crying baby that wouldn't stop. Xena talks to
the baby and it stops crying . She thinks she scared it mute. She's worried about what kind of
mother she'll be and tells Joxer about the baby toss at King Gregor's castle.

Back to Gabrielle and Lachrymose. Gabrielle tells him about Baby Bliss making her fall in
love with Joxer ("A Comedy of Eros"). He doesn't laugh. She tells about being hit with Xena's
flying parchment ("A Day in the Life"), and about being captured in India on the flying carpet
("The Way"). And Draco in love with her (ACoE), and Joxer thinking Xena is Meg
("Warrior.Princess...Tramp"), and Attis ("Fins, Femmes & Gems").

Aphrodite tells Gabrielle she should have used sex appeal. Gabrielle says she did - the
three naked Gabrielles ("The Quill Is Mightier . . .") and Autolycus with Velasca ("The Quest").

Suddenly Gabrielle and Aphrodite are wearing matching pink pajamas with bubbles flying
around and tells Gabrielle it's a slumber party. She asks if story telling isn't like writing, but
Gabrielle says it's a way to work things out. And she admits she stalled rather than tell Xena
about Argo.

In the tavern, Xena and Joxer are getting impatient waiting for Gabrielle but she has the
money so they can't leave. Xena starts to go anyway and runs into Blutos the brother of a warlord
Xena put in jail. He says he's going to kill her. She knocks him out. Gabrielle comes in and says
there was a delay. She tells them to get the supplies and to meet her at the spring. When Gabrielle
goes back to the spring, Argo is gone.

Aphrodite is now in a hot tub because animals are dirty. She invites Gabrielle, who turns
her down.

In a market Xena and Joxer are shopping. Xena worries about all the dangers her baby will
face. Flashback to the blind Cyclops, the Titans, and Gareth. Joxer also mention dryads, harpies
and Bacchae, and diseases. But she will have Xena. Xena hugs Joxer.

Gabrielle finds Argo in the store. Lachrymose appears and she wants him to change Argo
back, and says maybe he can't do it. He shrinks Gabrielle down to six or eight inches tall. Argo is
spooked by the tiny Gabrielle but she manages to calm him down. While still hugging Xena Joxer sees
Gabrielle and goes to talk to her. She tells him to make something up to tell Xena, then help her
find the god who shrunk them.

Back at the spring Joxer tries to call Lachrymose. When he mentions how bad life is,
Lachrymose appears. Joxer starts telling him how terrible his childhood was. Lachrymose encourages
him to tell more.

Aphrodite can't believe Gabrielle wanted Joxer to help. When Gabrielle tries to tell her
all the times Joxer helped them, all she can think of is all his goof ups. But she says he is a
loyal friend. Aphrodite admits she loves the dope. Gabrielle tells her Joxer convinced Lachrymose
to return her to her normal size.

Xena goes into the tavern and knocks out Blutos, then asks if anyone has seen a guy in
little pointed hat. There are a bunch of men in outfits with pointed hats. They're insulted. She
whistles for Argo.

At the spring, Lachrymose sees Gabrielle and starts to go after her. Joxer says if she was normal
size she would be easier to find. He changes her back, but before he can cast another spell on her,
she throws her sais, pinning his shirt sleeves over his head to a tree.

When pony-size Argo comes in, Xena begins to boil over and there are flashbacks of evil
Xena, including the one from "Paradise Found," Bacchae Xena, from "The Way," and demon-Xena in
"Fallen Angel." Gabrielle come into the Tavern and tries to explain that getting mad is not good
for the baby and all she has to do is make Lachrymose laugh. Xena throws a pie at Joxer, he ducks
and Gabrielle is hit. Suddenly there is a pie fight. Almost everyone gets hit except Xena and Argo.

Lachrymose appears and Xena throws her Chakram to hit a pie stuck to the ceiling. It
falls down into Lachyrmose's face. He begins to laugh and Argo is back to regular size.

Aphrodite can't believe a stupid pie fight worked. Gabrielle says she still can't write.
Aphrodite says at least she got Lachrymose in touch with his inner child. Gabrielle realizes since
Xena got pregnant all she's been doing is trying to make the world a better place and hasn't been
doing the things that make her happy, like writing, and maybe writing will help Xena' baby figure
out who she or he is.

Gabrielle thanks Aphrodite and she leaves.

They are on the road again and Xena is talking about a month's worth of back rubs from
Gabrielle. Suddenly Xena is hit in the face with a pie, but no one is around. As they walk off we
hear Lachrymose laughing.

.........

Another action-lite episode for Lucy. Which is understandable. We want to see Xena kick
butt, but with Lucy almost ready to drop, she had to take it easy. Consequently, I'm giving this
episode more latitude than I normally would.

It actually wasn't as bad as I remembered. Most of it was dumb, bordering on stupid, but
some of the flashbacks brought back some memories of some pretty good eps. And Aphrodite looked
pretty hot in her pink bikini - no complaints there. And I like it that Gabrielle seems to be
Aphrodite's only (mortal) friend.

Not sure why Gabrielle was wearing red pajamas, or where she got them from. To me, she
looked like Rene