On Nov 24, 7:48 am, 58
gmail.com> wrote:> Thanks for all the comments.
I'd suggest reading his comments a second time, they are worth it. He
was writing some really good stuff, in a good detail too for you.
And then check out his site, particularly:
http://www.fastseduction.com/youarenew/
> I think that night was a disaster and
> somewhat unrecoverable. She has texted me back, happy to have met a
> "friend". I'm not going for her any longer. It was either there, or it
> wasn't, and from all your pointers, I'm realizing how many things could
> have been improved upon.
>
> Nevertheless, I've learned a few things.
>
> "Tell her you can't hear her from the noise and walk her over to an
> isolated part of the club so you can avoid distractions."
>
> Yes, I will use that from now on. I went out a few nights ago again and
> had trouble with taking the Target away from her friend. I just didn't
> know what to do or say. I am an attractive girl, so this gets me in,
> but getting an actual *close is a step I have never accomplished but am
> working toward. I have too many friends. I would like more action.
>
> Formhandle wrote:
>> 58 wrote:
>
>>> So I'm halfway through reading The Game. Nevertheless, I'm
>>> enthusiastic and wanted to go out last night to try and put forth
>>> what I've read so far. Although I'm working through the lesbian
>>> scene, I'm trying not to modify the various techniques or methods too
>>> much. If evolution is anything, they should work for all women
>>> --whether heterosexual or not.
>
>> The Game is not a manual or guide. It's a novel, a story. It's not
>> written to be instructional.
>
>>> I went out last night to a local club. It was alternative night, and
>>> although most of patrons are gay men, there are generally a handful
>>> of ladies out. Most will be with their gay male counterparts, some
>>> will be with friends, and a few will come alone --like me.
>
>>> I walked in late, somewhere around 10:30. Hugged the bouncer
>
>> When you say hugged the bouncer - do you mean "gave him the hip-hop
>> handshake & back-pat" or do you mean "embraced him tenderly on gay
>> night"?
>
>>> and walked in to get a beer. I saw a Blonde 8 (will call her Tall)
>>> around the side talking with her friend (will call her Short). She
>>> turned to eye me and smile a few times. I took this as an IOI.
>
>> It's also a good time to walk over and talk.
>
>>> I know I'm not supposed to wait long, but I did.
>
>> A mistake, and if you're not going to approach her and her friend
>> right away after she saw you and already eyed you then you should be
>> talkng to others nearby as soon as possible.
>
>>> I stood along the side of the room, listening to the techno beats
>>> rumbling the walls, boom boom boom.
>
>> Sounds like the picture of someone trying to work up his confidence
>> but needing time to do so and on the verge of becoming a wallflower.
>
>>> I was thinking of an opener, which angle to approach, how to neg, and
>>> to be confident and funny.
>
>> Over-thinking.
>
>>> Then I decided against it. I walked to the bathroom, on my way
>>> smiling at her.
>
>> Sill didn't approach.
>
>>> I got my composure, and then I went back in. I came in at an angle
>>> to Tall (the Target). "I'm getting my friend a beer, so I can only
>>> stay a minute, but I just wanted to tell you that I saw you, and you
>>> have really nice hair." This sounds so silly to me in retrospect,
>>> but she really did have nice hair.
>
>> You don't do a time-constraint for the purpose of a compliment.
>
>>> It wasn't lying. And it definitely was flirting.
>
>> Which if detected as flirting before signs from her of real attraction
>> will ultimately not work in your favor.
>
>>> I put my hand through it, and she smiled and said "Wow, thank you!".
>>> Short turned away, and I could tell she was probably thinking I was
>>> hitting on her friend and would just have to sit and wait there.
>
>> You were hitting on her friend. So the book got you to just go out
>> and "do stuff" but sounds like you're still just repeating what you
>> might normally have done before - go to a bar, get alcohol, hit on
>> girls by complimenting them.
>
>>> Tall immediately started asking me questions, like where I'm from and
>>> what I do. I answered them quickly and turned to Short and asked her
>>> what she was drinking. She smiled, and I don't remember what beer
>>> she had. I was trying not to focus all of my attention on Tall just
>>> yet.
>
>> Making small talk and asking about what they're drinking is what every
>> other guy does. What exactly did you pick up from the novel that you
>> felt was instructional? Did it just inspire you to go out versus not
>> out and continue to do everything the same as you might have before?
>
>>> We made small talk, and I tried my best to include Short in as much
>>> of the conversation as possible. However, with the first glance (IOI
>>> #1) and then the load of questions she immediately asked me when I
>>> walked up (IOI #2), should I have just forgot about negging?
>
>> What negs? And why would you think you need to use a neg here?
>
>>> When my mind started to get a little flustered, I smiled and said I
>>> had to go and give my friend the beer I bought. They said okay, and
>>> then I left.
>
>> And saw as you walked over to a non-friend?
>
>>> A few minutes later, when the music got better, I walked back in and
>>> saw them to about to approach the dancefloor. I split them and said,
>>> "You all look like you're just about to jump in, but then you're not
>>> sure yet. So which is?" They both laughed, and after a few more
>>> seconds, they then proceeded onto the floor.
>
>> You're just telegraphing more interest, after ejecting after
>> complimenting and having a chit-chat about boring stuff like every
>> other guy... and not even following through directly.
>
>>> It's unfortunate. I'm not a great dancer.
>
>>> I stayed along the side to watch, but then I felt like a creep.
>
>> Yeah that is creepy. Where's your beer friend?
>
>>> Luckily my friend came by, and I tried to show him which was the
>>> Blonde 8.
>
>> Yeah, that always works. Stand just by the girls as they dance, and
>> point them out to your friend, like a fantasy trophy.
>
>>> He agreed with my finding, and after a while I went to the bathroom
>>> again.
>
>> Did you even read the novel? It may not be instructional but the
>> title is not "The Typical Unproductive Behavior".
>
>>> When I came out to wash my hands, there was Tall. She looked at me
>>> and smiled and tried to start up another conversation with me (IOI #3?).
>
>> Stop counting IOIs and just presume it. Tell her you can't hear her
>> from the noise and walk her over to an isolated part of the club so
>> you can avoid distractions. You should have also indicated to your
>> friend to make sure he kept her friend busy so she wouldn't feel left
>> out while this was happening and not to cockblock you later looking to
>> pull her friend away.
>
>>> We talked about what my future plans were, where the good clubs are,
>>> blah, blah, blah.
>
>> Stop having idle pointless chit-chat. Did the novel tell you to have
>> pointless chit-chat? At this point the only reason she would continue
>> with you doing this is:
>
>> - She's already attracted to you, but not because of your behavior but
>> because perhaps you're good-looking to her and all she wants is to
>> talk to an attractive guy.
>
>> - She's bored and you're the only guy who talked to her, but that's
>> all and she's not thinking anything more, and you're certainly not
>> going to get any further having boring idle conversations.
>
>>> In my head, I was thinking --I don't want to Number-Close. I want to
>>> fucking Kiss-Close. I've got enough numbers.
>
>> So far there's nothing to indicate you were anywhere near that unless
>> she was falling over drunk and grabbing at you.
>
>>> There we were, talking and laughing. The door opened, and in walked
>>> my girlfriend (Huge Obstacle).
>
>> This is retarded. Obviously you picked a place your girlfriend is
>> likely to go to, perhaps this is a small town or whatever. You didn't
>> prepare for that possibility. Also, going out to pick up girls after
>> reading "The Game" when you already have a girlfriend who doesn't know
>> you would be out meeting other girls, but likely to bump into you when
>> doing so, is just asking for trouble and complication.
>
>>> Busted.
>
>> Busted at what? You might s well have been at a bank teller making a
>> joke.
>
>>> She had been out with her friends that night and was supposedly not
>>> coming home until late. What to do here.
>
>> What's she doing out with her friends without you? You're somehow
>> doing something different than her? Or are you supposed to stay home
>> with the cat and wait patiently while she's out and probably flirting
>> with other men?
>
>>> I stood there, silently.
>
>> Like a statue that feels guilty for something inane.
>
>>> Tall immediately looked at her and said, "Um, I don't think I know you."
>
>>> Huge Obstacle left the bathroom, and I proceeded to try and salvage
>>> the situation. We talked more about other bars and clubs, and I
>>> asked her for her number. Number-Closed.
>
>>> She said she has exams but would love to go out with "us" sometime.
>
>> "Us"? What does that mean?
>
>>> Do I text her? Do I forget this one? What should I have done when
>>> Huge Obstacle entered the scene?
>
>> I think you should have frozen up even more and then acted
>> robotically, perhaps even started dancing "the robot" and act like
>> your circuits were frying. Then after getting the number say
>> something along the lines of "we'll go out somewhere sometime and do
>> something, maybe even something else"
>
>>> Yours,
>>> 58
>
>> Take the time to understand the materials the novel is referring to.
>> Don't be like most shmoes who read it and just go out without any
>> inkling of what anything is about, save for referencing "IOI" but
>> otherwise running through the same behavior you might otherwise do
>> when out meeting women.
