On Apr 7, 5:23 pm, Speeding
biz.org> wrote:>> X-No-Archive:
>
>> I was reviewing one of David D's books; Attraction Isn't a Choice
>> wherin he states that dinners and gifts lead to affection and not
>> attraction. That you cannot lead to attraction through dinners and
>> gifts. Teasing leads to attraction (something so f'n simple).
>
>> Well, I have applied this principle for the past year or so and have
>> stopped doing dinners and gifts (flowers, stuffed animals). The
>> results have been great, though I do pay for the date on about 30%% of
>> the dates I go on. I do sometimes take a date to Mc Donalds at the end
>> of our date and take her back to my place and have sex with her ON THE
>> FIRST DATE!!!
>
>> It seems to me that as long as there is attraction and the dinner and
>> gifts ( I dont' give gifts unless it's a holiday now) will make your
>> relationship stronger. It's when there is no attraction and you try to
>> create it solely with dinners and gifts that the problem exists.
>
>> My question is, do I understand it correctly that it is OK to spend a
>> little money, have dinner with my girlfriend once in a while and buy
>> her flowers on her birthday as long as you are doing other things that
>> create that feeling of attraction?
>
>> I think what David D was trying to say was do not try to get into a
>> girls pants/heart by spending money because it doesn't create that gut
>> level feeling of attraction. Without that gut level feeling of
>> attraction caused by cocky comedy and the like, the dinners and gifts
>> get you nowhere.
>
>> So now that I am with a girl in an exclusive relationship, what are
>> the rules on paying for dates? Before our dates where really non dates
>> and we just ended up at my place very quickly. But the time has come
>> for us to do normal couple stuff, movies, dinner, gifts (she bought me
>> a rather expensive gift for my birthday). I think as long as I don't
>> overdo them I should be good. But if I don't do them at all I might
>> die here, because that is what couples do!!
>
>> Long I know...
>
> Well... think about what David D said...
> Dinner and gifts lead to affection. And you already know you have
> attraction. A relationship differs from a short term gig by one detail...
> love versus lust. So, ideally, wouldn't it make sense that you'd want a
> measure of BOTH affection and attraction? You alreasdy know how to get
> the attraction... so you're going fine there. Affection is easier. But
> it's not so easy as just buying things.
>
> It has to have a meaning. You buy her a dozen roses. Big deal. Buy her
> two red roses, a white rose, a yellow rose and a pink rose. She's going
> to ask... even though she knows rose colors have a meaning. You tell
> her... Red is my lust and passion for you. That's why there are two.
> A yellow rose is for the fidelity between me and you. White is the symbol
> of the innocence and purity we share. And pink shows you all all my love
> and how much I care.
> (damn, poetry on the fly...)
>
> Affection will amplify her attraction and her attraction will amplify her
> affection. Balance is the key.
>
> --
> You could be a Cylon and not even know it...- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -
Speeding you are a fucking GENIUS thank you!!!!!
