That's this week... his current campaign ads her in North Dakota are all
about he stood up to that evil George Bush on Global Warming.
...at least once over the last eight years, when he wasn't telling us
what a great guy Bush was and how we should vote for him for president;
on alternate weeks when he wasn't cursing him as a pea-brained SOB.
In the Navy, there's the concept of the "Jonah"; a individual who
attracts bad luck like a magnet, but somehow manages to emerge unscathed
while all around him are maimed and killed.
Back in his Caribbean deployment on the USS Intrepid and USS Enterprise,
the A-1 Skyraiders he is flying crashed twice, and once hit electrical
lines... but he survived with only minor injuries!
Then comes Vietnam...and there sit all those A-4 Skyhawks on the USS
Forrestal... and here comes the accidentally launched Zuni rocket
skimming over the deck.
It could have flown right off the side of the ship...but something gets
in the way... that something being the drop tank under John McCain's
Skyhawk.
But McCain runs right down the refueling probe on the plane and emerges
from the inferno uninjured, trying to rescue another pilot when a bomb
cooks off near him... he is injured by the shrapnel...but he survives!
And is soon ready to fight again!
So it's off to the USS Oriskany... there he gets shot down near Hanoi
and parachutes into a lake... where the enraged North Vietnamese rice
farmers beat the crap out of him, crush his shoulder with a rifle butt,
bayonet him in the groin... But He Survives!
So he's made a POW and shipped off to the Hanoi Hilton where not only do
they not treat his injuries (one would think the groin bayoneting would
have been fatal without treatment from the viewpoint of infection alone,
but hey, this isn't just anybody they are dealing with here) and proceed
to themselves beat the crap out of him... BUT HE SURVIVES!
But his hair turns white. So he's paying a price for this harsh
treatment...either that, or they've cut off his access to Grecian
Formula 16.
I think this is illegal under the Geneva Conventions under the "Hair and
Toupee" clause.
So they lock him away for a few years of solitary confinement (one
wonders if he has strange memories of attending a flower show where
someone gets shot during this time*)..._BUT HE SURVIVES_!
So they torture him to extract a confession...and it works...but guess
what...HE STILL SURVIVES!
_IT IS ALIVE_!
Just like Godzilla, there's just no killing it.
You could shove a incendiary grenade up his rear and he'd fart fire and
keep right on going!
A Hero Is Born!
Back to the US... ditch wife #1, marry wife #2:
http://blog.spokanetogo.com/blogs/soundoff/cindy%%20mccain.jpg
And with his luck...yup...that's a Chinese agent.... the reason her face
looks so odd is all the surgery needed to make her look Caucasian... the
real Cindy McCain's bones are probably moldering at the bottom of the
South China Sea inside of a 16-gallon beer keg.
And he's going to give this strange Stepford Wife-like replacement the
launch codes for all of our ICBMs and SLBMs once she shows him that
Queen Of Hearts card.
And as Russia and the US nuke each other into oblivion, the laughter of
the ascendant Chinese shall be heard throughout the world.
But don't worry, for John McCain shall no doubt survive that also.
* And I'm not the only one who came up with this scenario, BTW:
http://www.usvetdsp.com/mar08/mccain_manchurian.htm
Commie brain perversions, ladies and gentlemen.
A deviated commie prevert sitting in the oval office.
Fluoride in children's ice cream.
Impure bodily fluids.
Sapping of the life essence.
"When the sperm cannot swim - the nation cannot thrive.
To keep the nation healthy - the sperm must stay alive.
Strong Aryan sperm - swimming with all their might.
Proud Nordic sperm - shall put Jewish sperm to flight."
I think Nietzsche said that once...Joe Nietzsche, the odd guy from the
halfway house on the next block.
Pat
