> On Jun 15, 8:32 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:
>

>> On Jun 15, 8:25 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>> On Jun 15, 8:20 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>>> On Jun 15, 8:09 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>>>> On Jun 15, 7:56 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>>>>> On Jun 15, 7:49 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>>>>>> On Jun 15, 7:39 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>>>>>>> On Jun 15, 7:34 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>>>>>>>> On Jun 15, 7:32 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>>>>>>>>> On Jun 15, 7:30 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>>>>>>>>>> On Jun 15, 7:27 am, whyz...@mail.com wrote:

>

>>>>>>>>>>>> cia, in the da house
>>>>>>>>>>>> say yo
>>>>>>>>>>>> homeland security in the da house
>>>>>>>>>>>> say yo
>>>>>>>>>>>> fbi, in da house
>>>>>>>>>>>> say yo
>>>>>>>>>>>> i'm locked up in a virtual mental hospital
>>>>>>>>>>>> say ufo

>

>>>>>>>>>>> so am i, said a few minutes later.

>

>>>>>>>>>>> no you're not, said five minutes ago

>

>>>>>>>>>> what do you do when the yin is in the house and making demands
>>>>>>>>>> you leave the house and yang out at the bar

>

>>>>>>>>> a "bar" is a commercial residence where alcoholic beverages are served
>>>>>>>>> to consumers and drinkers- Hide quoted text -

>

>>>>>>>>> - Show quoted text -

>

>>>>>>>> a long "time" ago
>>>>>>>> "space aliens"
>>>>>>>> "told" "me" to
>>>>>>>> read "books" and do work for the books of "earth"
>>>>>>>> now i know better
>>>>>>>> those "weren't" space aliens
>>>>>>>> those were space ships that killed the space aliens and were flying
>>>>>>>> around looking for
>>>>>>>> information since their gasoline supplies were diminishing
>>>>>>>> because space ships without space aliens aren't allowed back to the
>>>>>>>> space port

>

>>>>>>>> so anyways, i'm not going to work for spacemanless space ships anymore
>>>>>>>> the lesson, wait for extraterrestrial contacts before you go talking
>>>>>>>> to hologram recordings asking for help

>

>>>>>>>> and whatever you do
>>>>>>>> don't
>>>>>>>> ever
>>>>>>>> trust
>>>>>>>> little short
>>>>>>>> beeping
>>>>>>>> mushroom
>>>>>>>> looking
>>>>>>>> robots
>>>>>>>> named
>>>>>>>> r
>>>>>>>> 2
>>>>>>>> d
>>>>>>>> 2
>>>>>>>> and his sidekick
>>>>>>>> 3
>>>>>>>> c
>>>>>>>> p
>>>>>>>> 0- Hide quoted text -

>

>>>>>>>> - Show quoted text -

>

>>>>>>> oh wait, i forgot, i'm supposed to be locked up in a mental
>>>>>>> institution
>>>>>>> how in the world can a little robot from a movie be talking to me?
>>>>>>> i mean, get real, you can't even possibly be hallucinating a little
>>>>>>> round robot if you're full of antipsychotics and lobotomies

>

>>>>>>> so forget the past three replies

>

>>>>>>> backtrack

>

>>>>>>> okay, so the guy is at the bar
>>>>>>> the yin is all nagging and crying and complaining

>

>>>>>>> he yangs out at the bar
>>>>>>> orders a saki
>>>>>>> and the bartender says....

>

>>>>>>> "beep beep dot boop beep"

>

>>>>>>> and so i says,

>

>>>>>>> look i'm locked up in a bar
>>>>>>> and you've got no space aliens

>

>>>>>>> either you go to the spaceport and get more fuel
>>>>>>> or i'm going to not read you book

>

>>>>>>> and the bartender replies,

>

>>>>>>> "man, don't ever drink spaceship fuel again"

>

>>>>>>> and i says to the guy,

>

>>>>>>> well then, don't make me read those crazy books

>

>>>>>>> a ninja hits 3cp0 on the head with a chopstick

>

>>>>>>> (a symbol of a cymbal splash....ta dug dug piiishhhshshsh)- Hide quoted text -

>

>>>>>>> - Show quoted text -

>

>>>>>> cricketal reflections on cricketal deflections:

>

>>>>>> the crickets
>>>>>> what are crickets
>>>>>> crickets are those little grasshopper looking things that scrape their
>>>>>> legs along and make that wierd high pitched
>>>>>> sound you hear at night

>

>>>>>> tomatoes,

>

>>>>>> what are flying tomatoes?

>

>>>>>> a duck!

>

>>>>>> duck?

>

>>>>>> i'll duck if there's a cricket

>

>>>>>> but i won't duck if you say so...

>

>>>>>> okay, don't believe me.

>

>>>>>> i only believe crickets

>

>>>>>> and you're not a cricket because crickets don't throw tomatoes at
>>>>>> usenet comedians- Hide quoted text -

>

>>>>>> - Show quoted text -

>

>>>>> post tomatocalypse,

>

>>>>> if i only had more fuel
>>>>> i could've moved at least an inch
>>>>> i slipped on the book i threw on the ground
>>>>> and fell flat on the cricket

>

>>>>> the bartenders toes facing me

>

>>>>> nice pants

>

>>>>> oh yeah,

>

>>>>> the cia
>>>>> the fbi
>>>>> homeland security
>>>>> mental health department

>

>>>>> what happened?

>

>>>>> i think i better get out of here

>

>>>>> any second now,
>>>>> a ufo is gonna appear

>

>>>>> get out of here

>

>>>>> this is a schtick

>

>>>>> get it?

>

>>>>> i don't play with sticks
>>>>> i'm wanted in 3 galaxies for hitting 3cp0 in the head with a chopstick

>

>>>>> oh well,

>

>>>>> this new stuff is never going to wash with the crazy people next door
>>>>> if these padded walls ever had doors
>>>>> sure wish they had doors...

>

>>>>> at any rate, back to the taoist joke

>

>>>>> dammit, yin wants me back at reality
>>>>> don't yang out at the bar anymore
>>>>> they only serve you gas and engine cleaner

>

>>>>> so there is you and there is me
>>>>> there is yang and there is thee
>>>>> how many does that make
>>>>> i myself, and the reader makes 3
>>>>> i know that's only 2
>>>>> but i, myself, don't think this poem is very good
>>>>> so i will leave you with that

>

>>>>> the moral?

>

>>>>> don't read my jokes
>>>>> they make no sense
>>>>> but you can hear the sublimity of their thoughts
>>>>> dancing like fireflies in your empty skull
>>>>> echoing
>>>>> i should have said echoing
>>>>> but then they wouldn't be sublime
>>>>> just another sound you hear as you walk around and hear the city
>>>>> sounds
>>>>> walking home
>>>>> wishing yin won't hit you with a car
>>>>> hoping to god that when you do vomit
>>>>> or fall
>>>>> there will be a trashcan or a pillow

>

>>>>> that's better
>>>>> no schticks here sir
>>>>> this is usenet
>>>>> don't ever do schticks on usenet
>>>>> those are from movies
>>>>> here on usenet, you only do verbal grammatical sentence structure
>>>>> challenges
>>>>> here on usenet, you only do verbal grammatical sentence structure
>>>>> challenges
>>>>> else if, lao tzu will kill you
>>>>> with his logic puzzles
>>>>> and we will all die
>>>>> because lao tzu doesn't do logic puzzles
>>>>> he reads the comic section- Hide quoted text -

>

>>>>> - Show quoted text -

>

>>>> what do you call it when lao tzu reads the comic section of a
>>>> newspaper?
>>>> a transmigrated japanese businessman
>>>> so what was that about the 3 immortals of taoism?

>

>>>> there was once three immortals of taoism
>>>> this post/reply/thread
>>>> which will apparently never end
>>>> myself, who is typing this post
>>>> who apparently will never take a break
>>>> and you,
>>>> you nozy
>>>> no good
>>>> reader of mine
>>>> won't you ever reply
>>>> and break the monotony of my taoist qua comedic routine turned taoist
>>>> allegory
>>>> you're immortal if you read the next 10,000 replies in this thread
>>>> this thread is immortal you know
>>>> cause i said so
>>>> i vow to not to leave this thread
>>>> till you stop reading it
>>>> then i'll go home
>>>> back to reality
>>>> dualistic consciousness
>>>> reality
>>>> cause one things for sure
>>>> my fingers are not glued to the keyboard
>>>> they couldn't be cause if they were i wouln't be able to type anything
>>>> more than asdfjkl;

>

>>>> you know what i mean...

>

>>>> that's it,

>

>>>> i'm going yang on this,
>>>> i'm not gonna stype ever
>>>> you know...
>>>> i mean don't even have to stop typing
>>>> i just stype and get it over with.
>>>> stop while you type
>>>> that way you get the full effect

>

>>>> you try it,

>

>>>> try to stop typing and tell us about it at the same ti- Hide quoted text -

>

>>>> - Show quoted text -

>

>>> this is a not a good place to type
>>> ninjas and samurais and shoguns threaten to reply at every joke
>>> its not safe
>>> i'll go this way over here- Hide quoted text -

>

>>> - Show quoted text -

>

>> oh oh,

>

>> philosophers are over here

>

>> take your pick

>

>> in about 1 hour or so
>> either a shogun of philosophy is going to find me
>> or a philosopher of philosophy

>

>> and you know what philosophers do to you?

>

>> they turn you over to the gophers
>> phil the gopher
>> its true

>

>> all philosophers work for phil the gopher

>

>> they love that guy

>

>> taoists know the truth
>> phil is only using you for your woodchips

>

>> phil speaks chipese- Hide quoted text -

>

>> - Show quoted text -

>
> the very many numbers taoist immortals
> not very many since i started typing this thread
> half of them gave up
> this thing is all yang
> where's the part about reality
> where's the yin?
>
> probably there is no yin here on usenet
> just a bunch of mental chatter
> just read between the tao te ching chapter
> read between the paragraphs
> read between the lines
>
> and you'll see that we're all just things that lao tzu never dared to
> mention
> probably were little pictures he left out
> lao tzu was probably a horrible artist
> se he took up poetry
> and china never really recovered from that one either
>
> its these taoist guys
> they keep on daydreaming
> in thoughts
> and never a single image to offer
>
> i have a tao te ching that includes pictoral
> interludes,
> not by lao tzu of course
>
> i wonder if lao tzu drew pictures
> and then wrote poetry about how great his pictures were
> and then the "publisher", more like chuang tzu and master kong, aka
> the scribes, didn't have
> the artistic abilities to replicate the pictures so they just copied
> the chinese poetry
> and so lao tzu reincarnates as a japanese businessman looking at
> comics and manga searching for the lost
> pictures that chuang and kong couldn't transcribe for him