One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and
apes?

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad
girls live.

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help
section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't
going as ghosts but as mattresses?

If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is
no woman around to hear him...is he still wrong?

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it
considered a hostage situation?

Is there another word for synonym?

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"

On 22 Nov 2006 10:58:34 -0800, "Immortalist"
yahoo.com> wrote:

I wish he'd tell me.

c...@optonline.net wrote:

Why does Santa always go down the chimney?
Because it soots him!
(that's one of Santa's favourite jokes! *HO! Ho! ho!*)

Where does Santa stay when he's on holidays?
At a Ho-ho-tel!

What does Mrs. Claus sing to Santy on his birthday?
"Freeze a jolly good fellow!"

What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a duck?
A Christmas Quacker!

On 22 Nov 2006 11:19:38 -0800, "Immortalist"
yahoo.com> wrote:

"You're the Salvation Army, right? And you save fallen women? Can you
save some for me?

On Wed, 22 Nov 2006 14:04:50 -0500, calee@optonline.net wrote:

overheard in college while walking out of the library: "yes, she's the
kind of girl my mother always warned me about who I never thought I'd
have the luck to meet".

Immortalist wrote:

In sci.logic, Therion Ware
city-of-dis.com>
wrote
on Wed, 22 Nov 2006 20:11:12 +0000
<7lb9m2h0muq4oiubaqpekh70q4c4s7mian@4ax.com>:

On Wed, 22 Nov 2006 22:13:11 -0800, The Ghost In The Machine
sirius.tg00suus7038.net> wrote:

Smiler wrote: