When you are an orphan on Earth.
If parents do not want you or love you. And there is no grown up there
during childhood - except those that shout or reprimand - and you find there
is no warmth of love or comfort. No one to turn to if you are afraid - then
you find that the special design of Earth is that Earth itself and nature
become your mother your father your parents.

That the sound of the wind against the window makes you feel safe and warm
like a father should. The rain, the birds, the clouds, all sights and
sounds and sweets and tea - are designed specially to be enough to replace
the desolation of a total lack of love or care or interest.

And in this state you learn to know nature - and of the clouds that speak
and you can hear the love and nature are your family and thus the wind
speaks and the rain speaks and as you love water and free water - and flow
down streams with water and laugh with happiness as all these things become
family and friends you then know of the design of Earth which is for those
who are born into a world with no warmth or love or care from other humans.

The special arrangement is perfect - where the perfection of the world far
more than replaces the human parents and adults so many others have. You
somehow grow more an outward into space and far beyond the mortal coil that
contains the spoilt and cosseted and petted children.

That the sky and clouds speak - and you learn to talk to clouds and
understand what clouds say - and how understanding is written there.
Nothing to do with evaporation and science.
It is the nature of eternal existence - and the backdrop of dark skies and
myriad leaves reflecting light that causes gasps of joy that you would never
see or notice in a normal human world. That such is the art and painting
and memory that you would treasure forever - that there can be such light
and such beauty - that plays with your soul and thoughts and mind until you
become part of nature.

You learn of horses and wild things - and treasure wild flowers - and as you
play and read and learn and paint and sing - no one notices except to shout
or criticize or reprimand - but there in the arms of those I love is the
consolation that is for ever.
In magic places where humans cannot find me - I spend many hours or even
years when only a few moment pass on Earth - with my beloved friends -
eternal friends - who ease the suffering of neglect and violence from the
humans.

Where are you now? I often asked and called them God for this was the only
word I knew. On the end of the phone on a number I never dialed. Is there
anyone anywhere who loves me? Is there anyone anywhere who notices me?
And their dear voices as they say they always will.

There is no understanding or explanation for the sadness - that I never did
anything wrong - I was not to blame that my parents did not care - I was not
to blame for the abuse and cruelty and suffering - it was not my fault.

Did humans know then who I was?
They never will.
Even now they mock, they laugh, they jeer.
The cold callous mockery of the humans in the ugly human world.
Where I live with beauty and nature as my parents and family - and my
eternal friendship with those who humans never will or never can meet.
And they are left with their nastiness and laughter and mockery ringing in
their ears - as veritable proof of their own ugliness.