> Executive Function hotmail.com> writes:

>> On 2 Sep, 18:53, mika gmail.com> wrote:

>>> On Sep 2, 3:09 am, Executive Function  wrote:

>

>>>>   I didn't like the way you
>>>> automatically assumed I must have misinterpreted the threat though (I
>>>> didn't).  You could have asked for clarification about that first.

>

>>> Even if you didn't misinterpret the threat, it is irrelevant.  You
>>> have two choices:  live your own life as you choose according to your
>>> own nature, or live a life based on other peoples' desires and
>>> expectations.

>

>>> Every time you are provided with a suggested course of action to deal
>>> with your shit, you come up with some excuse why you can't take that
>>> action.  This claim that people are out to get you, whether accurate
>>> or fantasy, is just another attempt to avoid facing and dealing with
>>> the actual practical work you need to do (that is, you would need to
>>> do if you actually wanted to address the problems you have been asking
>>> for advice about here).

>

>> If we would/were to compare ourselves as akin to musicians when we
>> work together, then I would be the drummer to your violin Mika.  I can
>> look after the beat but outside of the gig I need a bit of help.  It's
>> a trade off.

>

>> Yesterday I was in a hotel, in complete meltdown, and asked my ex to
>> take me to the nearest psychiatric place because looking at myself
>> from the third person I knew that a fuse or two was not working
>> upstairs, and willing yourself to die for a few hours whilst propped
>> up against the corner in fetal position was a definate no no.

>

>> If I could simply do what I want without overload or meltdown then I
>> would have much more options practically - but as I have to work with
>> what I've got (including brain damage from birth because our genetics
>> don't react kindly to drugs and birth trauma) then no matter how
>> intellegent I seem to be ordinarily then I have to give over my
>> independance and decision making sometimes.  And this is very scarey -
>> and all I want in such times is to feel safe, because when I am like
>> this there is so much going on up top that I am very
>> ssssssslllllllllllllllloooooooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

>

>> To be a practical aspie - I have to take this shit into account.  If
>> people would give me advice while taking this into account like I have
>> to - I might get much better advice i think.

>

>> I've met a lot of aspies that stay with thier parents and never move
>> out of thier own personal comfort zone wey beyond the norm, and others
>> who just put up with the overload and the meltdowns and try and 'go
>> for it', whatever 'it' is.  I really would like some good advice from
>> this forum, and occaisionally I've got it.  You, Tom, Erwin, and
>> (*very* appropriately at the time, (he knew it, and you didn't))
>> Archangel, have all helped me at one time or another, and I truely
>> appreciate that as the years come and go.

>

>> My relationships with people, whether online or off are very important
>> to me, whether I show that or not, and more often I do not.  Sometimes
>> I have all the emotional intelligent response of a teaspoon
>> unfortunately.

>
> You know, E.F., I have an idea.  Let's have a fucked-upness competition.
>
> You tell your sob story, then I'll tell mine, trying to out-misery yours.
>
> Then you'll tell more horrible things about how your life sucks, again
> attemting to take the lead in misery and fucked-upness.
>
> Eventually, one of us will concede and the other is declared winner.
>
> But you know what?  One funny thing:
>
> No matter who wins - how much has that wallowing in misery and self-pity
> helped either of us to live a better life from now on?
>
> Zero.
> Zilch.
> Zip.
> Nada.
>
> And let's repeat what Mika said: "Every time you are provided with a
> suggested course of action to deal with your shit, you come up with some
> excuse why you can't take that action."
>
> And look!  In the post I'm replying to, you're *doing just that*.
>
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