danger man
+++

gday psychic blog

+++
incubus
'drive'
+++

just got back from a drive
as it happens

chester th magician
has rebuilt my

surf unicycle hub

+++

didnt fuck with it
wot a sensitive man

we can keep it pure

+++

liza and i
trekked down to

trippy's shed
and picked it and him

up

+++

i had a nice time

+++
?
'track 7'
+++

it;s bASICALLY
a motorycle shop

next door to another motorcycle shop

+++

little choppers everywhere

she slung me a rum

when she walked in th door

th witchdoctor is visiting

+++

where do we smoke drugs then ?

+++

oh ok

+++

th straights dont worry me

i'm a witchdoctor

+++

i wish you were here

played at th right timre

i got to give it full voice

i gotta gig

down th edge of th island
next week

+++
U2
'angel of harlem'
+++

dont think

womble and i will
play corner of cavill avenue though

+++

can barely hear myself think
th bitches downstairs

barkin liek mad

+++
frank black
'superabound'
+++

tomorrow morning is
workshop day

i have my surf unicycle home
and th hub is rebuilt

+++

means i
have t get off th net

+++

wont share

that first ride

+++

flight test

with a brand new hub

u are a magician man

th bicycle shop

wouldnt even touch it

+++

fuck man

+++

used th original

mounts

jenny two is still

half a yellow bicycle

+++

cool as

+++
jewel
'everybody needs someone sometime'
+++

i told trippy
how many smiels

th bitch had engendered

+++

she been around so long

+++

got unridable

after all that

beach sand and salt

+++

27 inch
semi racer wheel

aired down

+++

yr gunna hit th big beach but

where ?

+++

i got a gig at
womble's party

at the edge of th island
next week

+++

i sang sweet enough
in liza's car

love tripper
at fifteen he

taught me how to bunny hop a unicycle

he coudlnt ride one

+++

and he built
my monoshock unicycle

chopped it in half

+++

[deleted]

+++

th graves family
adopted me

009

+++

bugger

+++

a similar named family

and trace their ancestory

back to somethin similar

+++
kevin bloody wilson
'stack the fridge'
+++

told liza th truth

+++

she handled it well

+++

th witchdoctor of australia

***

tripper is

family

+++

i have to kill
th net access

tradition

my unicycle
prototype

is back online

+++
the red hot chilli peppers
'track no07'
+++
do re mi
'track 12'
+++
the red hot chilli peppers
'track no07'
+++

bloody computers

+++
phil collins
'in the air tonight'
+++

my psychic blog is fucked

+++

the unicycle man

my most stable character is about to go

walkabout

+++

we're takin th
oracle of kuta offline and

goin back
to bein the head witch of th gold coast

pirate jenny

+++

kuta lady isnt impressed

i'll have to face to face and

give her some of th secrets

that arent online

secret mens business

before i fuck off

+++

she'll bee the
new

witchdoctor of kuta

+++

th beehive
stingless

will grab u dear

+++

i score my drugs from
beeville now

more reliable

+++

and just right
for th kuta man

black honey man
native stingless bees

indeed

+++

kuta religion
has made it';s point

it;s time

+++

i dont care yr a woman

u used t fuck

the other kuta lady

yr it pistol

+++

black hads decided

+++
kevin bloody wilson
'that fucking cats back'
+++

i fucked

th head witch of th gold coast

for three yrs

i am th head witch

i'm pirate jenny

+++

fucked th head witch
in th granny bar's

doorway

th bouncers just

watched

+++

i flew

a surfboard

on my fingertips

above my head

on one wheel

down cavill avenue

+++

we knock out that
old bog

with a flapper wheel and
we bodgie it

+++

u gotta bee
on th road

by next weekend bitch

+++

s pack

999

i bought some
black sandshoes

th old dunlop volleys

stick liek shit to a blanket

for th surf

+++
led zeppelin
'gallows pole'
+++

yes robert dear

u'll be on th playlist

are current

+++

fuckin musicians

all boy/girls

+++

hey keith

+++

we do wanna sing with ya

+++

cum like a girl
while singin and

th girls drip
is that puddle

cause yr happy to see me or
have i scared th piss out of ya ?

+++

i care factor
i am the unicycle man

+++

it;s all good

+++

thje land surfer

my msot stable character

is abotu to piss of with my body

is ok though

he gets laid

in th doorway of nightclubs

+++

hot blondes

stop him in th surf for piccies

+++

and his fans are screaming

+++
violent femmes
'country death song'
++++

yeah alright

th copw paddock
is just aroudn th corner

i like

surfin on th land

down country lanes

cant hear fuckheads

as i surf th drains

+++

yesterday

i surfed th
new estate drains

th boys all

watched awestruck

ridin thru wot little moss

remained

+++

tripper builds a mean

monoshock unicycle

+++

got
LST written up it

if ya find a piccie

i dont provide

sorry

too many taken

+++

this unicycle
will drag me

to a low tide beach tripper

+++

it was nice knowin ya man

+++

i know this beast

+++

she's seen an easy
five million smiles

soon as

she clears my workshop

i am fucked

+++
david seville
'i told the witchdoctor'
+++

i told kuta lady
she'll have to take over
for kuta man

+++

breaks tradition but
pirate jenny
already spilled

secret mens business

all over th net

+++

ya gay bitch
yr next

+++

th surf unicycle

has more say than i do man

sorry

+++

u dont understand our relationship

+++

the nature of things

especially th things

of a real witchdoctor

+++

yr ex girlfriend

rode th fuck out of

my skatebike

still in love with both of u

but u know that

+++
joel turner and the modern day poets
'these kids'
+++

gay lady friend
jennifer

didnt blink

when i offered a magic child

one of the
kuta lady;s

she;s seen th magic
first hand

when we

crsuied thru th

rbt

and th cop was

pickin up th first cone and

she had one

bewteen her legs

sittin on

th other kuta lady;s lap

and we were

headin to kuta

mountnain

mt coot tha

to find out

how kuta

is spelt

+++

when u broke up
i know u livin together agin

kind of

kuta lady rang me

come and

pick em up

and ya dragged me

to a strip club

with yr last girlfriend

and

+++

pretty goth girl and i

danced

+++

ok

+++

when she comes hoem from holland

u call me

+++

rum drinkin bitch

+++

whitey

+++

i'll leave that kid with you whitey
or yr girlfirend

fuck th mega bitch

+++

and u would too

+++

slayin me and
th rest of bosy with

yr tales of

fistfuckin yr girlfriend
in th arse

u wanan see
both of my ex wives

takin it
in th arse

on video ?

+++

th things a man does
they both agreed

and smiled for th camera

+++

fcuk u pair have funny arguments

+++

can be both of ya
ya know

i know u can share

+++
c+c music factory
'things thatr make you go hmmm..'
+++

the kadaitcha man of kuta
franchise

is not to bee
sneezed at

+++

if i fuck off

yr it

+++

th beehive

wont give ya a choice

are ya ready girl ?

+++

she;s given me a path

+++

to fuck off

+++

once that
surf uncicyle

htis th surf

and tha first hot blonde

stops me for a pcikie

yr gone babe

+++

till ya come join us

+++

u have to serve yr time

+++

she'll always bee there
to help u

i dont care yr a chick pistol

you'll get over it

fuck them

+++

fuck them

+++

more power

+++

u'll cave

+++

still answer my messages

+++

strawberry not so brave

+++

or she didnt get her phone back
talk to yr mum

+++

doesnt feel liek strawberry

strawberry
woulda said

soemthin

+++

told me who u were
i come form th underworld too

minder on th showground
seventeen yrs

+++

i got a new

biker contact

no names

+++

th triumph and
norton guys

not again

was vice president

of th last club

+++

th president owns a boat anchor
a norton

and cant be present

i'm chairing this meeting

+++
queen
'i want to ride my bicycle'
+++

th president of vice

of th bundaberg

historical club

+++

dr death

+++

th chair
i ride a sidecar

which is a chair

doesnt recognise u cunt

+++

he hands me a beer

ok

u can talk

+++

th chair
recognises u

+++

i'm, sorry
our rleigion

got dr azahari

as our death curse kill

instead of

dr death
from th bundaberg hospital saga

wot can i say

i fucked up

our religion is kuta

luv u guys

+++

in our defense
we are the kadaitcha man of
kuta

and dr azahari
did make bombs

fo rboth kuta beachbomb attacks

but

i still

+++
massive attack
'protection'
+++

gotta stand up and

face my motorcycle club

+++

will ya come with me strawberry ?

+++

yr old man
runs a harley shop

u understand

+++

th world of

stone

+++

gotta stand up to my
brethren and

cop to fuckin up and

grin wickedly

+++

i know
u and kuta lady have

fucked

+++

ur as trapped in this as i am

+++

either my ex girlfriend

versace lady jane is lyin

or kuta lady is

but they have slept together

+++

one of them
is not lying

and i know jane

+++

when i told ya

when we wer eboth

fuckin femjacks

and i wa sjenny

in th sexchange program

u listened

+++

u two talk

she rang me

to abuse me

for a message

u sent to her

+++

yr still
sellin drugs to er

i know

+++

ever since our
dial a dealer

on th south side

wrapped his bongo van
around a tree

life changed

+++

where are ya jane ?

+++

seven tiems in as many minutes

she had to fuck u

just to find out

+++

ex centrefold

i led a charmed life

+++

did ya tell her
i fucked th pub rpcikteaser and then

fucked th lesbian
who couldnt

and then married th lesbian

+++

six foot one and half
amazon woman

gay lady

bouncer

+++

redhead

ya know i still luv ya bitch

+++

helped make me
pirate jenny

was with me
when th doc said

have a sex change

maybe he was lookin

more at u

+++

pot and
a unicycle

comfortably numb and

i sing to pretty girls

on strete corners

+++

and can lick my clitty

suck shit bitch

+++

but if i fuck a chick
it fucks my orgasm for

four days

unless we bond

+++
kevin bloody wilson
'sunday morning'
+++

stops me
doin casual sex

with my magic
its for th best

+++

ya pagan bitch

+++

we lived
permaculture for

three yrs

+++

but no kids

+++

i am sorry

+++

th psychic half dutch oz bitch

screwed both of us over

fuck she was strong

+++

i'm still alive but

she got all th money

+++

and my firstborn son

said his name when i came

gave th

day
and time

of his birth

she had to

destroy me

poor bitch

+++

scared fuck out of her muzza

think about it

+++

makes me cry

+++

he was born on monday

and it was

smack on

three am

no wonder she

went off th edge

+++

i would ahve to

she carried him to term

+++

huge stones
elizabeth

+++
motorhead
'paranoid'
+++

i'm far enough remove dnow

fuck u werer strong

+++

could feel me

five k';s away

when i masturbated abotu u

+++
marianne faithfull
'pirate jenny'
+++

but u umm
married jenny

not paul

+++

hmm

+++

u deserved that magic child

i should stop whinging

+++

love and hate

are so close

+++

u taught me
how to cum

liek a girl
th lesbian didnt do that

closet lezzo

+++

versace lady jane
was more honest than u

whiel still fuckin her

billionaress female friend

she called me jenny

to my face and

to this day

has a jennifer doll

livin beside her bed

+++

i keep th wizard painting
i'll honour my promise

mad wet redhead

+++

my menagerie awaits

"wot if it;s wandered ?'

did that ever bother me ?

"morticia used to crusie th clubs for phone numebrs "
"sorry , no"

ok then

+++

i'd be dirty dancinw ith five
of her girlfirends

i can pcik up

where i left off

+++
pj harvey
'the dancer'
+++

catwoman lee

th mad redhead

wants to go dancing again

i dont have t ask

but she;s gotta pass th drug tests

we'll see about that

+++

i have to transfer
into th same system

yr in
i walk in th door of centrelink and

ppl's hearts go

fuck man

+++

spend
three quarters of an hour
in th company of wowen

i'm signing out now

all th little boys squeeled

ah man

+++

supposed t be compulsory

they thank me for coming

at all

+++

stick's it up th young mailgerers

th boy
alergic to girls

still shows but
usually half cut

+++

somne of our crowd
cant come out in sunlight

th wheat is

seperating
from th chaff

+++

th old hands

+++

have all shown their hands

+++
massive attack
'what your soul sings'
+++

i had a dig
at th system at th other day

+++

they did ask us

whiel deferring to me

cause i bothered to shwo up

i signed out first

this time

+++

i am not spending

more than ten minutes

in th company of th blonde

no way man

+++

what goes on tour
stays on tour

+++

u impress

+++

i would come in and

teach fitness clases

if i was guaranteed

i;d bee fucked stupid

but u knew that

+++

in writing

i been offered before

+++

one of
the ten best body;s in surfers paradise

went missing

sang on strete corners
in the fortitude valley

with boys and girls

and all other six sexes

climbin up my legs

+++

i still ahvent met
another entertainer
who;s ben laid

right in th doorway

of th nightclub

+++

morticia was special

head witch of the gold coast

u;ve moved

i'm takin th title

back

+++

"u watch th bitch come home"
crap

"u watch"

+++

"the singing unicycle man is"

"alive again"

+++

u're awful confident
"i can use a mirror"

+++

"the bicycle racer"
"got slain by me every time"
"the unicycle man is"

"far more famous"

++++

ok dude

+++

"i gotta go be me"
had a professional makeup artist

+++
budgie
'Napoleon Bona- Part One / Napoleon Bona- Part Two'
+++

\\one of my old

characters

from this blog

has resurfaced

+++

he;d
sail down th edge of th island
and

disappear

and cum home four days later

with wild tales

of sleepin in penthouses

+++

she's rebuilt

good as new

th surf wheel

spins

true

fuck man

+++

do ya still dance
with yr gay sister

in th gay nightclub

sabrina

+++

sunday nights
after morticia had fucked me

twelve tiems

we'd go dirty dancing

when th floor was empty

sunday morning at three am

+++

u owned a dance shop

+++

fuck u could dance

all th chicks hated ya

but u knew that

could drag yr pussie

down th dance floor

+++

they got us on camera one night

we walked outside

th audience in th street

clapped

huge screen outside
and we thought we were alone

u remember

+++

u ran down th beach

backwards because

it;s th clsoest u can feel

to ridin an

actual unicycle

+++

and u rode it

three pedals backwards

+++

bloody female gymnasts

a witch at that

+++

i pulel din yr driveway

you were standin there wi th hsoe

yellina t yr kids

wher'e sth fuckin carsponge goen then ?

is ok beautiful lady

i bought one on th way here

was supposed to be apussy pad

for my surf unicycle but

u're kinda pretty and

i didnt bring any chocolates

wot would u liek a cup of coffee of ?

+++

a beautiful smiel

+++
sopranos theme song
'woke up this morning'
+++

wanted an angel
it took morticia's help

+++

we both loved u

dumb bitch

+++

all three of us
ahd a silver hatch

my new
silver car

is close

+++

i threatened to paint mine a
different colour

th unicycle changed colours so much

u threatened to beat my head in

+++

u have th first unicycle

i ever owned

it might be worth

soemthing soemday

+++

th workshop calls

my surf unicycle

wants it;s seat
th old one didnt return

no big deal

th 26 will sacrifice it;s seat

for test flight

+++

it's all good

+++

my man;s bike

is almost ready

to hit th surf again

we wanna play with tails

and gettin more drive

from th waves

+++
bobby mc ferrin
'dont worry be happy'
+++

u dont need my
psychci blog

ont ht internet
wanring ya of

major calamity;s

is only usually readable

after th fact

i care

hugely

+++

i recommend
ya read th stoenrs bible

bent as

and after about

five or so bongs

in th company of
mellow ppl

otherwise

ya can get a little white dog up ya

and cant th little fuckers play socccer

wow man

.
.
.

pirate jenny

"black"

bein th sum total of

'the land surfer"

+++
p.s.

come nippleclamp
away

.
.
.

arlo guthrie
'highway in the wind'