For thousands of years, the Chinese people have related the
vicissitudes of life to changes of the moon as it waxes and wanes; joy
and sorrow, parting and reunion. Because the full moon is round and
symbolizes reunion, the Mid-Autumn Festival is also known as the
festival of reunion. All family members try to get together on this
special day. Those who can not return home watch the bright moonlight
and feel deep longing for their loved ones.
Today, festivities centered about the Mid-Autumn Festival are more
varied. After a family reunion dinner, many people like to go out to
attend special performances in parks or on public squares.
People in different parts of China have different ways to celebrate
the Mid-Autumn Festival. In Guangzhou in South China, a huge lantern
show is a big attraction for local citizens. Thousands of differently
shaped lanterns are lit, forming a fantastic contrast with the bright
moonlight.
In East China’s Zhejiang Province, watching the flood tide of the Qian-
tang River during the Mid-Autumn Festival is not only a must for local
people, but also an attraction for those from other parts of the
country. The ebb and flow of tides coincide with the waxing and waning
of the moon as it exerts a strong gravitational pull. In mid autumn, ...

Kate: Mom, do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday?
Mom: No, Honey, what?
Kate: A nice teapot.
Mom: But I've got a nice teapot.
Kate: No, you haven't. I've just dropped it.
凯特：妈妈，你知道我要给你一件什么生日礼物吗？
妈妈：不知道，宝贝，是什么呀？
凯特：一把漂亮的茶壶。
妈妈：可是我已经有一把漂亮的茶壶了呀。
凯特：不，你没有了。我刚刚把它给摔了。
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Father: Jack, why do you drink so much water?
Jack: I have just had an apple, Dad.
Father: What's that got to do with it?
Jack: I forgot to wash the apple.
爸爸：杰克，你干嘛喝这么多水呀？
杰克：我刚才吃了个苹果，爸爸。
爸爸：可是这跟喝水有什么关系呢？
杰克：我忘了洗苹果呀。
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"I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a
sponge in me."
"That's terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?"
"No, but I am always thirsty!"
一个男人对他的朋友说：“我动了一次手术，手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。”
“真是太糟糕了！”朋友说道：“你觉得疼吗？”
“不疼，可是我总感到口渴。”
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An elephant said to a mouse ,"no doubt that you are the smallest znd
most useless thing that Ihave e ver seen ."
"Pless ,say it again .Let me take it down ."the mouse said ."I will
tell a flea what I know."
一头大象对一只小老鼠说：“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。”
“请再说一遍，让我把它记下来。”老鼠说。“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听。
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Valentine’s Day is a popular festival for lovers in western
countries. On this day, sweethearts buy cards, candy, flowers and
romantic dinners to prove their devotion to the one they adore.
People fallen in love always dream each day to be Valentine’s Day.
While it has been August now, for those sweethearts who are living and
working in western countries, the next Valentine’s Day will be about
six months later. What a pity!
It is a luck that the Chinese Valentine’s Day has come. It falls on
the 7th of August this year. In Chinese lunar calendar, it is on July
7, thus it has another name—Seventh Eve. Have you planned to spend a
Valentine’s Day in China with your sweetheart in these days? It must
be a quite different one because there are totally different customs
and traditions for this day. The first one is that on Seventh Eve
people always release lotus lanterns on water. As darkness falls,
surfaces of rivers, lakes, and ponds are dotted with the lanterns that
young men and women have released. The lanterns move slowly on the
water, carrying with them the longings of young men and women for a
perfect marriage. Under these circumstances, the sparkling stars in
the sky, the lotus lanterns in the water, and the lovers in the
moonlight or in the light of the lanterns together form the most ...

A guy hosted a dinner party for people from work, including his boss.
All during the sit-down dinner, the host's three-year-old girl stared
at her father's boss sitting across from her. The girl could hardly
eat her food for staring.
The man checked his tie, felt his face for food, patted his hair in
place, but nothing stopped her from staring at him. He tried his best
to ignore her but, finally it was too much for him.
He asked her, "Why are you staring at me.?"
Everyone at the table had noticed her behaviour and the table went
quiet for her response.
The little girl said, "My Daddy said you drink like a fish and I don't
want to miss it!"
某人举办一场宴会招待他的同事，包括他的老板。
吃饭的时候，男主人的3岁小女儿目不转睛地盯着对面她父亲的老板看，甚至没有吃东西。
老板先检查了领事，然后抹抹脸上看有没有食物，再整整头发。那小女孩依然盯着他看。他尽力不去注意这事，但这太难了。他忍不住问小女孩：“你为什么老盯
着我看？”
桌子上的每个人都注意到了这事，安静地盼着她的回答。
小女孩说：“爸爸说你象牛饮，我可不想错过看到！”
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One day a ten-year-old child asked his mother, "Mom, what is a
synonym?"
"What? You even don't know what a synonym is? How foolish you are.
When I describe you as foolish, I mean you're silly, stupid. Now you
know what a synonym is ?"
"Yes, a synonym is using bad language." The child concluded.
一天， 一个10岁的孩子问母亲："妈，什么是同义词？"
"你说什么？竟然连同义词都不懂！真是个笨蛋。我说你是个笨蛋，就是说你是个傻瓜，是个蠢货。你现在明白同义词的意思了吗？"
"明白了。同义词就是骂人。"
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Mother asked her little daughter who was reading a book. "What are you
reading, dear?"
"I don't know." the little girl answered.
"You don't know? But you were reading aloud, so you must know."
"I was reading aloud, mummy, but i wasn't listening," explained the
child.
女儿在大声读书，妈妈问：“亲爱的，你在读什么？”
“我不知道，”小女孩回答说。
“你不知道？你不是在朗读吗，你应该知道的，”妈妈说。
女儿解释说，“我在朗读，可我没有在听啊!”
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Hello Group,

I'm back for more help. I am a vegetarian who is going to China on
holiday shortly. How do I say in Mandarin. Also how do
I say in Mandarin. Any other related phrases would also
be welcome. Thank you.

Hari.