On Jul 12, 4:45 pm, Ensign Lord Admiral Robert Thomas Alouisious
Chatterton, The African Explorer
chatter...@jackanapes.ws> wrote:
> In alt.flame.jesus.christ, Father Haskell spake thusly...
>
>
>
>> On Jul 11, 6:16 pm, Velvet Elvis
noplace.org> wrote:>>> On Fri, 11 Jul 2008 02:42:40 -0400, Ensign Lord Admiral Robert T. Chatterton
>
>>> wrote:
>
>>>>Guy takes magic cracker. People threaten to kill him or at least send
>>>>him to hell.
>
>
>>>>...but wait, there's more:
>
>>>>Guy frightened by death threats returns magic cracker; church assholes
>>>>say it's a hate crime!
>
>
>>>>P Z Myers says it's just a goddamn cracker!
>
>
>>> "Look at those bloody Muslims, getting pissed off about a little cartoon of
>>> moh... HEY! WHERE'S OUR FRIGGIN' CRACKER????!!!! BRING IT BACK YOU BASTARD
>>> OR YOU'RE A DEAD MAN!!!
>
>> Fuck's sake, they didn't get this upset by that scene
>> in The Exorcist.
>
> When I went to my First Communion I made sure to get the cracker in my
> mouth in a way that it would not get wet. I made sure that my mouth was
> good and dry also. When got back to the pew with my friends I whipped it
> out of my mouth so we could all get a look at what this thing was that
> they were making such a fucking big deal about. It looked like a piece
> of goddamn cardboard to me - and the guys that ate theirs said that's
> what the thing tasted like.
It probably was. Eat enough, and you'll stay
regular.
> Some guys pulled theirs out half melted to
> show around. Obviously we didn't take Communion very seriously.
>
> Hey, I've wondering how I could get myself officially excommunicated.
> I'd live to have a nice letter from Rome to proudly hang on my wall.
> Maybe kidnapping a holy cracker would get the job done. I wouldn't
> chicken out like the college kid did. He was a believer anyway...
>
> --
> Sincerely,
>
> Ensign Lord Admiral Robert Thomas Alouisious Chatterton -
> - The African Explorer and Protector of the Morals of the Realm
> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>
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> Man is certainly stark mad. He can=3Ft make a flea
> ~ but makes gods by the dozen. ~ Montaigne, 1588
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